Wednesday, May 27, 2009

All I'm Asking For Is A Clean Bloodmobile

Worker: "Have you given blood before?"

Me: "Yes, numerous times."

Worker: "You aren't in our system."

Me: "For the love of God!"

Worker: "Have you ever been to Africa?"

Me: "Yes, however while I was there I did not sleep with any Africans, do drugs with any Africans, contract malaria or smallpox, or receive (money, sex, or drugs) in exchange for (sex, drugs, or money). At least not that I can remember."

Worker: "Have you had any vaccinations recently?"

Me: "Yeah, my job forced me to get the MMR vaccine last month even though I'm an American and obviously received it when I was two."

Worker: "Do you have any questions before you donate?"

Me: "Yeah, what's the deal with this bloodmobile?"

Worker: "What do you mean?"

Me: "It's clearly a biohazard. You're making me answer all these questions about whether or not I did any questionable things with men in Africa, meanwhile this place has dirt all over it and there are BLOOD...DROPS...EVERYWHERE I look!"

Worker: "Don't worry...we use iodine."
Copyright (c) 2008-2009 by Kevin McDonald


SSP said...

ewwwwwwwwwwwwww that is gross!! they won't even take mine, cuz I used insulin made from beef more than 30 years ago.....i am NOT a bearer of mad cow disease...I may BE a mad cow, but I don't think it is contagious

WhisperingWriter said...

Oh ew! I'd have gagged.

It's hard for me to give blood. I start to feel woozy and once I even passed out. It was embarrassing but at least I wasn't wearing a skirt.

Anonymous said...

I've donated lots of times...and I hate the questions every time.

I would whine about it, but I'm afraid that they'll give me a dull needle on purpose...


Good to see you weren't killed by vampires.

SassyTwoSocks said...

Did you take the picture while you were driving? Cause it kinda looks like it...

Anonymous said...

Last time I gave blood the lady rolled my vein and I was like that's it, I'm done.. She was crazy clumsy.