Things I am thankful for on Thanksgiving:
1. That I did not burn my house down while frying my turkey.
2. That I wasn't born in America in the 1600's, because that would have totally sucked. Plus I'm pretty sure they were burning those witches because they were the best looking women in the town. This is totally not cool.
4. Shaving utensils.
5. Two showers a day.
6. The Office.
7. Bendy straws.
MOVIE LINE OF THE DAY:
"Those aren't pillows!" -Planes, Trains, & Automobiles